DevalCare™ Conclusively Shown to Be of Scant Electoral Importance

Dear Dr. Bones,

Critics: Health-care cost bill ‘rushed through’ Legislature By Chris Cassidy | Monday, August 6, 2012 .... The landmark health care cost-containment bill Gov. Deval Patrick is due to sign today — intended to save billions of dollars — was rushed through the Legislature and could actually end up costing taxpayers, critics told the _Herald_. The final version of the 300-plus page health care cost-containment bill came out the night before the vote in the House, leaving lawmakers mere hours to sink their teeth into the rambling document, opponents said. (( &c. &c. ... yimmer ... yammer ... yada ... ¡SNIP! ))

Ad quem responduissem Patricius McTammany:

Now if EYE were among the Fearless Funders of Freedumb, LLC, I believe I would have a word with the Freiherr Geheimrat von Fehrnstrom about exactly what _The Boston Herald_ is good for, agitpropwise. And, more to the immediate peanut-gallery point, about what it is NOT so good for, a category to which the present performance clearly belongs. IOAO, (( fold here )) "in our arrogant opinion," that is, at any rate. Though indispensable in its proper place, the Herald should be firmly kept therein an’ be slapped down as soon as it gets uppity.  Fruits of the Jay School an’ frathouse babes do their Movement little good when they start gettin’ self-toplofty ideas about behavin’ like the Wall Street Jingoe  Or even like the Daily Torygraph back home in Anglosaxonstan the Blessed. The fruits and babes are not themselves blameworthy, I guess, however. Almost certainly it was bicycle-challenged Jay School perfessers at Wombschool Normal University (or St. Dilbert Antistate College, or Wingsdale, or George Masondine, or whatever seminary of Redarkenment) who replaced part of the mush native to the kiddies’ dittopans with the impractical notion that just bein’ "journalists" means they can burble along plausibly about absolutely anythin’. ’Look here, O Fearless Funders," Eye can imagine myself expostulating with the Betters of us all, "At how Freelord Fehrnstrom’s old fratbuddies burble about "[t]he landmark health care cost-containment bill Gov. Deval Patrick is due to sign today." Can your firstlordships really think--or even just sincerely but mistakenly claim--that you are gettin’ your fundin’s-worth? "Considering that the Jobs Plague is more or less under control, for the moment at least, to worry that the B.H. fruits an’ the B. H. babes will go on strike, or resign en Mass., should their Walter Mittens delusions of Walter Lippmannship not be accommodated is ludicrous. ¡Easily replacable are they! Perhaps your firstlordships might let a few of ’em go regardless of their behavior, simply pour encourager les autres. Among other things, that plan ought to save your freelordships’ managerial hired hands a bundle on ... ¡of all things! ... the health-insurance benefits blackmail. Quite without regard to anything the General Court may be vilely scheming. "If that seems a little harsh, at least your firstlordships should have the hirelin’s prepare a clearly demarcated sandbox for their babes an’ their fruits to play Walter Lippmann in. Saturday-morning unsigned editorials would be ideal, it seems to Paddy McTammany, plus any other zone of traditional fishwrappery that one can safely count on nobooby of any importance ever actually attending to. A Party Neocomrade (fifth grade) Ch. X. Cassidy could burble away there harmlessly enough. No real-world good would come of it, of course, yet as long as we are talking about a TRADITIONAL sort of fifth wheel, the fratkiddies could flatter themselves they are bein’ pandered to an’ so maybe resent it a little less when required, as they certainly oughtabe, to keep their little noses in firm contact with Geheimrat von Fehrnstrom’s grindstone the rest of the time." As for the Freelord Privy Councilor himself, sentimental attachment to the old ’journalistic’ ’hood is admirable only on condition that it never interfere with gettin’ today’s agitation-propaganda job done today. And (it seems to Paddy that) there is some real interference here, because every corporation-paid minute that a PNC-5 ChXC wastes on "landmark health care cost-containment," is a moment that might have been devoted to denigratin’ the Law Squaw a little more throroughly still in the eyes of Louisedayhicksville. One would have to be asleep not to notice that Freelord Fehrnstrom thinks the chances of his Master carryin’ Massachusetts in the fall are zeroe.  00.00% at best. Whereas the re-election of Fedguv Senator S. Philip Fratboy, his freelordship’s Number Two Charlie McCarthy, is at once (A) achievable and (B) no sure thing. Naturally an ignorant lay sheep like Paddy McTammany must hesitate a little before offering suggestions for improvement to the Willi Munzenberg of our time. ¡Eye knows, Dr. Bones, I know! Yet sometimes, after all, things really are just as things appear to even the meanest intelligence. Like "2 + 2 == 4," and "The sun rises in the east," and "It will not help Fratboy one bit to keep on warmin’ The People’s Seat (Pat. Pend) that he should ostentatiously run agains DevalCare™." That much of a bleat seems perfectly safe. A little less so, but only a little, is to point out that the less media attention DevalCare™ (which used to have a different monnicker that slips my mind at the moment) attracts, the better for Mittius Coriolanus Pompo, Demander of Apologies, Master of (Eric an’) Seamus, Baincapper Extraordinaire, (&c. &c.) on the national stage as well as for Fratboy up here in the zeusforsaken boondocks of Lovecraft Country. Happy days.